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WHO YOU ARE BY THE CAR YOU DRIVE...
VWFOOL - January 24th, 2004 at 09:37 AM

got this email today, i dont know, hav a laugh if u want...:) but dont take offence.



The Car You Drive…

Alfa
Passionate and romantic, you fancy yourself. A bit unreliable, and can be eccentric too. You hate BMW drivers, but think and act just like them.





Audi
You would like to believe you are part of the new generation that is caring, environmentally conscious and family-orientated. Actually quite boring; nothing more than a glorified wuss. Will one day probably drive a Merc, but you still sometimes wonder if you shouldn't have bought that Bee-Em.


BMW
Self-centred, ambitious, dynamic and assertive. Can be a big show-off pig. Likes impressing too. Buppies and kugels past sell-by date. You think you will be CEO one day. Actually an office weenie who thinks you are God's gift.



Daewoo
Faceless, subservient and demure (except for Matiz drivers). To you, a good deal is to work from nine to five, get nothing for it, and still say thank you. And then you wonder why you don't have money for a time after hours.


Fiat
Cute self-confident girls climbing the corporate ladder with ball-breaking as their hidden agenda. Will take everything you own if she divorces you.


Ford
You still live in the 70's, trying to cope with the 90's (don't even mention the millennium). A loyal, diligent worker, but baffled by office politics and labour policies. Next car will probably also be a Ford.


Holden

You are the ultimate on-road wanker. You think your 80s model Commodore is a V8 supercar, OR you think by owning a Barina you’re a true Holden fan. You’re either a redneck or a way-too-standard family parent – but either way, you most likely drive like you’re the only person on the road. You’re even ignorant enough to argue that the new Commodore is better than the new Ford.

Honda
You aspire to drive a BMW. You are an opinionated pain-in-the-butt. The ultimate suffragette, or the boss's girlfriend (male or female!).



Isuzu
You like the smell of diesel and have secret fantasy of being a truck driver.




Hyundai /Kia
Quite progressive, intelligent and practical. But misguided. The kind of person who will suggest a sub-committee to find solutions to what the committee couldn't. You will always maintain that a Korean car is better than any Japanese model.


Jeep
You would like to believe you are living the American dream and just love the great outdoors. The closest you get to it is by watching Days of Our Lives and the Adventure Channel.


Land Rover
You are a designer person with a designer life, who always pays too much for everything. Designer mud comes free with the badge. You're a closet colonial racist and have fantasies about the Queen. If you have a Freelander, it was probably a break-up gift from your ex.

Mazda
A Ford driver with less money. Mostly staid boring with no image and less imagination. Lots of retired people drive Mazdas. You're in the way and should get off the road.


Mercedes-Benz
Responsible, immaculate and conservative. Boring CEO clones with too much money, or the office super-geek who can't remember what it's like to have fun. Definitely not dating material.



Nissan
Good, solid, responsible, loyal office-fodder. You like to travel and maintain that you can sell ice to the Eskimos. Favourite answer: "It's a company car."



Mitsubishi
Not as label-conscious as your Land Rover counterpart, but still suckered into believing in the ultimate Paris-to-Dakar, African adventure. You drive through puddles to create your own designer mud. You believe you've made the grade, but everyone else knows you've got a long way to go.


Peugeot
Thinks France is the best country in the world and bores everybody with your limited French knowledge and tales of the Louvre and the Sourbonne.




Porsche
Small dick or mid-life crisis.





Renault
An eccentric who likes doing things the wrong way around. Usually the one who asks all the silly questions at staff meetings. You fervently believe you have flair, but it's less than that of a French cookbook. Most probably gay.



Ssangyong
A make-believe fool, because you'd like a Pajero but can't afford it. Don't actually know that the engines are made in India and not in Germany.



Toyota
Although there are thousands of them, you mostly can’t spot them in their zero-image cars. Toyotas are good, reliable cars and are bought by a wide variety of people who have zero personality to go with their cars and are basically chicken-shit scared people who will never take chances and will therefore be driving Toyotas forever.
The most zero-image car in the world?, ... a white Corolla

Volkswagen
Highly overrated for dependability cars since the days of the Beetle, but they do have a good re-sale value. Usually practical, sensible people who like to drive fast where nobody can see them. They are usually loyal to their brand to the point of irritation due to the fact that they lost their virginity on a Beetle's back seat.

Volvo
As square and safe as the car


Starbug - January 24th, 2004 at 10:58 AM

dont know about you... but i like to drive fast where everyone can see me:D


65square - January 24th, 2004 at 11:45 AM

So, if I have a VW, Kia & a Holden, that makes me a misguided wanker who drives fast when no one can see me?? Cool!

By the way I'd never argue that a Korean car is better than a jap one! The Kia is crap!!


OZ Towdster - January 24th, 2004 at 12:18 PM

What!!! they didnt mention meyers Towdsters.hehehehe:P:P:P


Da Wiz - January 24th, 2004 at 02:02 PM

Well I spose that's one reason for my loyalty ;) :D


Rota_Motor - January 24th, 2004 at 03:21 PM

im withyou starbuggy

Danielle


lulu94 - January 24th, 2004 at 03:22 PM

oops that was ment to be me, forgot i was still logged in with his name


Flying VW - January 24th, 2004 at 05:14 PM

Yeah I like the Ford one especially since I've owned about 6 of them, and I've just spent the day with a Ford Club I'm in. We had a Dyno Day. I had 148 KWs at the rear wheels. :thumb

And most Holden Dunnydorre Drivers are TOSSERS
who want to be Peter Brock or Mark Skaith.

I also know SOME NOT ALL VW drivers who's loyalty to the brand is IRRITATING. :P


sgetty - January 24th, 2004 at 05:35 PM

so true about the holden drivers haahaha yeah. used to drive them, must have grown out of that got a ford and two dubs now.... all my mates drive holdens argue about how australian they are and i tell them to f@#k off cause most holdens where either designed in america or germany. GM or opel


Flying VW - January 24th, 2004 at 05:38 PM

YEAH SO TRUE alot of Holden's are designed in Europe.


Robo - January 24th, 2004 at 07:16 PM

Well at least the VW owner description is a lot better than the others!..:thumb
Rob...


Softop - January 24th, 2004 at 07:20 PM

Hey! how come Jag's dont get a mention?:(
Roger.


kombikim - January 24th, 2004 at 08:26 PM

:( nothing about Humbers:( I am ?


Menangler - January 24th, 2004 at 08:33 PM

Kimm, the administrator had to edit the Humber driver out :o


Anthiron - January 24th, 2004 at 08:47 PM

i like to drive fast where everyone but police can see me:P i totaly agree about the holden one:D.....does piss me off that there is no subaru section:(


VWFOOL - January 25th, 2004 at 12:54 PM

u should make one up yourself then
dave that is an awesome video u got going on ur avatar...


butchered oval re build - January 28th, 2004 at 12:36 PM

someone needs to print stickers like below

I,d rather be driven my vw Beetle
something like that with the vw emblem


Starbug - January 28th, 2004 at 12:50 PM

Mini:
Old Mini- you are most likely a very tall person who likes to show how flexible they are by fitting into a mini, as you think this might have more of a chance of getting you laid, quite a good scam as you are usually well endowed enough to pull the trick off.

new Mini: when you grow up, you want to be a BMW driver.

(hope no-one took offence!)


Bugged Again - January 28th, 2004 at 01:25 PM

Very clever except i drove fiats amd am not a woman.

Jag driver
One who is super fit from running after the car picking up the bits that fall off
and generally very poor having to replace all the bits. The mechanics best friend and the RACQ NRMA etc worst enemy. :D


modulus - January 28th, 2004 at 01:31 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by kombikim
:( nothing about Humbers:(


This has been taken care of in a separate post; the dealership has been eliminated. MI6 suspects the Morris Cowley Brigade.