You have to be old enough to remember Abbott and Costello, and too old to REALLY understand computers, to fully appreciate this. For those of us who sometimes get flustered by our computers, please read on ... for those who don't, you're too young anyway. If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch, "Who's on first?" might have turned out something like this:



COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store.
ABBOTT Can I help you?
COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den
and I'm thinking about buying a computer.
ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.
ABBOTT: Your computer?
COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one
ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.
ABBOTT: What about Windows?
COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?
ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?
COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?
ABBOTT: Wallpaper.
COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.
ABBOTT: Software for Windows?
COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have?
ABBOTT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office; can you recommend anything?
ABBOTT: I just did.
COSTELLO: You just did what?
ABBOTT: Recommend something.
COSTELLO: You recommended something?
ABBOTT: Yes.
COSTELLO: For my office?
ABBOTT: Yes.
COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?
ABBOTT: Office
COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!
ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.
COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I
want to type a proposal. What do I need?
ABBOTT: Word.
COSTELLO: What word?
ABBOTT: Word in Office.
COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.
ABBOTT:The Word in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?
ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue "W".
COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue "w" if you don't start with some straight answers. OK, forget that. Can I watch movies on the Internet?
ABBOTT: Yes, you want Real One.
COSTELLO: Maybe a real one, maybe a cartoon. What I watch is none of your business. Just tell me what I need! ABBOTT: Real One.
COSTELLO: If it's a long movie, I also want to watch reels 2, 3 and 4. Can I watch them?
ABBOTT: Of course.
COSTELLO: Great! With what?
ABBOTT: Real One.
COSTELLO:OK, I'm at my computer and I want to watch a movie. What do I do?
ABBOTT: You click the blue "1".
COSTELLO: I click the blue one what?
ABBOTT: The blue "1".
COSTELLO: Is that different from the blue w?
ABBOTT: The blue "1" is Real One and the blue "W" is Word.
COSTELLO: What word?
ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: But there are three words in "office for
windows"!
ABBOTT: No, just one But it's the most popular Word in the world.
COSTELLO: It is?
ABBOTT: Yes, but to be fair, there aren't many other Words left. It pretty much wiped out all the other Words out there.
COSTELLO: And that word is real one?
ABBOTT: Real One has nothing to do with Word. Real
One isn't even part of Office.
COSTELLO: STOP! Don't start that again. What
about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?
ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.
COSTELLO: What's bundled with my computer?
ABBOTT: Money
COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?
ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.
COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?
ABBOTT: One copy.
COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?
ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.
COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money? ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!




(A few days later).
ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?

ABBOTT: Click on "START".......







[ Edited on 20-2-2006 by Bizarre ]

Ha ha, very clever. I know how they feel sometimes.:thumb

very good

Brilliant man .

Very clever

You have way too much spare time Barry

man i love those the old comedies, they dont make comedians like they used to.

I remeber watching this old Jerry Lewis movie about 4 months ago forgot what the name was.

Girl rocks up in a mint 60's beetle she says to Jerry Lewis (bellboy) " i want you to get everything out of the trunk and bring it up to my room"

Jerry opens up the back of the beetle and see's the engine and freaks!

next thing it shows Jerry panting and leaves the engine in her room!!!!

U cant get comedy like that these days!

very clever, did u come up with it? if so very cool

it doesnt beat the dead parrot sketch or the philosopher song

awww.....could debate that ...

Considering this was .... what 30yrs earlier???

Abbot and Costello would have to be one of THE first media comics???


Ummmm.......you HAVE heard the "Who's on First" sketch??


More to the point......... you HAVE heard of ABBOT & COSTELLO Barls???

of course and red skelton as well mate. i had a upbringing that included all the great comedians including Bill hicks

thats classic i love the whos on first sketch... this one is just as good

Lol

nice one bizarre brings back the good old days when on a rainy sunday you would
have movies galour on all 3 commercial channels to watch all arvo, ma & pa kettle,
bing & bob,cowboys & indians,elvis & girls hmmm theres a theme there & of cause
abbott & costello, by the way about the "click on start button":P:thumb

i love it...

have to agree with bizarre, it is the greatest.
the who's on first sketch is the most translated and appreciated comedy sketch in the world. its classic and nothing will beat it. not even monty python, black adder or red dwarf.