Over the past few weeks, my kids school has issued contracts that they'd like the parents to sign agreeing we raise our kids in a particular way, and to understand that if they don't behave in a way acceptable, that there are the normal consequences.

Whilst in some way I can understand their reasoning (as there are some right little shits there), I don't believe that signing a piece of paper is going to fix whatever problem they are perceiving. It seems a little draconian, and little bit big brother to me.

At the moment I haven't signed, and am in the process of writing a letter to the school outlining my issues, and stating that we raise our kids with acceptable principles, and so long as they don't tell me how to parent, I won't tell them how to teach - within reason.

So.....has anyone else had such a request come from their school this year? Is anyone aware of any NSW policies that have passed requiring such "contracts"??

[ Edited on 29-3-2006 by squizy ]

I don't have kids, but that is quite amazing. It must have come to a point where the majority of teachers were asking for it. I do believe that bad parenting would not be balanced by good teaching. However bad teaching could be balanced with good parenting.

Maybe it is a workplace relations issue?

i think if my kids brought something home like that (yr8 and yr11 and 2 diff high schools) i would file it under g for garbage

I help in a high school and the behaviour of today's kids is outrageous.

Bring back the cane and hit the little bastards until they get the message.

I'm tired of being completely powerless to anything effective to and with a kid who tells me to get F^(*%d.

What I would like to do it to punch the little foul mouthed s%^t out, but I dare not do more than report him to a stupid education system that is little better than a glorified child minding institution.

I like my work, but it is so frustrating at times. This contract business is probably the last gasp of a politically correct education system that started to dumb us down in the 1960s.

You can blame it on the looney left.

I work at a school as a maintenance contractor. 5 of the teachers have been in the game for more than 25 years, and all of them hate the job now and are just going through the motions till retirement. They constantly complain about how modern society have legislated out of existence their ability to use their own methods of teaching and punishment. These same methods that taught most of us over 30 years of age and worked quite well. Im shocked at the level of knowlage that these kids have, its terribly low compared to me at the same age. I could go on and on. But I will say this, Its been my observation that the majority of kids with problems have BAD parents, this seems to be the issue, not the child.
Rob...

At the high scholl that i attended in Brisbane they insisted that if your child was to attend their school, then the pparents must sign an agreement saying that if your child misbehaves then the school has the rights to give them the cane.

Lee.

I am a parent of a 10,13 and 17 year olds

I believe they are normal kids and they have some freedome. the 13 yo in particuler is quite "out there"

That said i am regularly commented to as to how well behaved they are.
I see it as normal.

The biggest problem i have with that bit of paper is not commenting on how the teachers behave.
I have quite a few issues with the teachers at my youngest's school, who is still in primary.

I would be happy to sign - there would be a few additional lines though

If you sign this piece of paper and your child shows bad behaviour, does that mean the school can sue you because they have a signed contract from you stating the kid has been brought up properly? What is properly anyway?
If a child has learning difficulties and social problems, usually no amount of 'good parenting' can help that child behave in a 'normal' way. What would happen then? And what is 'normal' anyway?
If you don't sign the contract, will the child's education be at stake because teachers won't try as hard in teaching them knowing the parents didn't sign a contract?

Eeek... too many questions this early in the morning! :P

A child might be a perfect angel at home, but once with their friends all that can go out the window so of course the child might not be an angel at school... :P

I have no concerns in regards to discipline in my household - and yes the occasional smack comes out to quickly solve an attitude or respect situation. I agree that the schooling system has gone soft - yes I received the strap at school, and have no issues in receiving it, and I think I turned out all right. I also don't plan to sue those that gave it to me.

What I am concerned about is that everyone received these notes (no doubt so that the parents of the little shitters didn't scream out harassment!!), however it does smack of an education system that is now trying to play catch up, and to put the onus on parents to do the right thing.

However - I do the right thing.....so why should I sign? We're already in a society where you can't do this, can't do that, be careful about this and that else I'll sue etc, etc, but things need to be fixed from a legislation perspective. Stop all of these goodie two shoes no kids right for lifers who'll dob me into DOCS if I give my kids a clip around the ear in public sometime, and let me (pod and Bazza too) get on with parenting their kids in the way that they seem fit.

Don't sign it.

Take a contract around to those whiny bastards and see if they'll sign a contract that says they'll actually learn to spell, to prepare lessons rather than copy notes that have been used by 15 other teachers. That they will pronounce words properly and actually work for the entirity of the school day. That they will not trot out the overused lie that they work during thier 12 weeks off.

And a real big section stating that they will allow 'grub'ernment and public assessment of thier performance.

I would be taking their little contract to the press and embarrassing the 21 year old who dreamed it up straight after graduating from a course they got into with a tertiary entrance rank of 36!

Squiz,

I reckon they are damned if they do....etc

If they send a letter to all parents then they are outlining the overall expectation of a certain level of behaviour. The teachers all ready have this under the code of conduct. If they dont comply, complain.

Parenting varies sooo much, so having a universal set of guidelines gives an indication of where the line is.

Its like lunches, some parents reckon a maccas in the school would be great, some want an organic health bar and some want pub grub etc etc

There is no easy answer but trying to outline behaviour in a letter is really hard without sounding like a pontificator or a wanker. As usual the ones who do ok get tarred by the same brush as that which identifies the little ba$tards.

The parents of said $nots are usually the ones up threatening teachers and wanting little jonny cut heaps of slack.

Hence the popularity of private education facilities that can maintain a different value system because the consumer pays for it.

Its funny how the cheaper or free a system the more its abused.

In hospitals we found that patients making a (small) contribution to the cost of medications increased the compliance with them out of sight. Ppl would just shove the freebies in the drawer. Go figure.

I went to a school with class canings and it didnt affect me so shut up or I will bash you all (joking.....)

kiss

What is your solution?

kkk

Bart Simposn is to blame . BAN THE SIMPSONS!!!!! or at lease till all kids are in bed.
Miychell

No way, Simpsons is awesome! Brings some sanity into my life of insanity.... :P

I never got caned by teachers at school and I turned out alright. Some kids need caning but it shouldn't be done by anyone besides their parents or other kids (not bullying, just teaching a lesson). I can say that if a teacher had of hit me I would have hit them back. Physicallly harming someone who can't defend themsleves is one of the lowest things a person can do. I guess a parent can make that decsion when disciplining their child but anyone else should keep their hands to themsleves unless they'd like the same thing done to them. Maybe I'm biased as I'm not a teacher, or a parent, but I do have parents and have had many teachers, good and bad.

That being said I don't agree with signing a form telling people how to rasie their children. I'd tell them to stick that form somewhere other than a letterbox

[ Edited on 29-3-06 by EgeWorks ]

Well said, totally agree.

A teacher at my high school actually hit a boy (and he did deserve it mind you, but still...) with one of those huge metre long wooden rulers across his back. Left a whopping great bruise and she got fired as a result, but she said 'someone had to teach him a lesson'. This boy towered over his mates, so none of them would ever lay a hand on him if he was out of line and his parent's didn't care either.

Good behaviour has nothing to do with physical or loud verbal discipline, I never raise my voice, and you can hear a pin drop in most of my classes...

My step-mum is a uni lecturer in Linguistics.... she works ALL the time, if it's not marking work it's preparing more. Never ending!

Thanks Bruce for your thoughts on this. I'm very closely engaged with the school, and certainly don't invoke an us and them relationship with my kids teachers. At the beginning of every school year I make a point of meeting the new one if I haven't already done so, and get up to school every few days when we have our school aged kids (we have a blended family). I was also on the school Support Group, so have a relationship at that level too.

It just seems odd that it has now come to this.....that we have to have these things coming out of the school when it wasn't required in the "olden days".

I'll still be meeting with the teacher tomorrow to talk it through.

Good luck with it all Squiz! It'll be good to voice your thoughts, and to hear the teacher's too.

My son has just begun his sentence in the system this year. A small country school, combined classes, wonderful teachers. Will be interesting to see how we go when we move back to the 'bigsmokes' next term. One thing I have gone out of my way to do is monitor my child, by communicating with the teacher I am able to nip any misbehaviour in the bud. My opinion is that he is there to learn, social skills as well as academic development. Too many parents just shove their kids into the system, not back the teachers up etc then go complaining about thier childs behaviour and trying to put the blame on the teachers.

Yes 'free thinking' individuals are great. But perhaps the best results are obtained by giving children some boundaries. Without any structure, or exsposure to any consequences is there a possibility that may create very narrowminded adults, bitter about every hurdle they face, or conflicting opinion to thier own 'free thinking'? The ability to reason comes through exsposure to knowledge. How can a child, hell bent on disrupting class, disrespecting teachers etc expect to learn and grow. Is it fair on the other willing and co-opperative students, when a good part of the teachers focus is directed towards the 'difficult child'? Yes there are some bad teachers out there, but there are also many different schools to choose from. Don't like the school, then leave? Private or public, there is no guarantee the teaching will be perfect.

It is sad that a school has to resort to contracts, but on the upside, contracts are a common occurance in daily adult life. Perhaps the kids may learn something about commitment and obligation? :duh:

I sympathise with both parties.

Having taught for 2 years and coming from a family where 3 of 4 brothers are teachers, as are both my parents and three of my aunts and uncles, I have heard all the bad stories before. Teachers do work hard, get paid little relative to qualifications, and by and large they are not shown a lot of repsect by kids or many parents.

That said, the holidays are amazing. I know, I experienced them.

I'd be a little hesitant to sign a contract, but then I'm probably not the parent that needs it. I think what the school is trying to get across it that, just like the parents have expectations of the school, it's just as reasonable for the school to have expectations of the parents. That is, that parents will back the school up in discipline and work with the teachers rather than against them. Becasue the latter is often the case. All my family went into teaching to help people. Nothing is worse than having an ungrateful child abuse you loudly and then to have his parents brush it off, make excuses or worse still, ignore the schools phonecalls and letters. That is why there will be a shortage of teachers before too long.

BTW, most of the current crop of teachers are due to retire in the next 5 to 10 years. If you want to look after your children well. Look after their teachers.

HRMatt, I think you oversimplified the situation.

Bruce, more power to ya brother.

Hahaha, if I had to teach a class for a day I'd be giggling at the class clowns and smartie pants like I did when I was at school. That would only make them be funnier, so they wouldn't learn very much from me!! :P