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 Bizarre
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The artist formerly known as blue74l
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| posted on February 20th, 2006 at 04:52 PM |
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Who's On First?
You have to be old enough to remember Abbott and Costello, and too old to REALLY understand computers, to fully appreciate this. For those of us who
sometimes get flustered by our computers, please read on ... for those who don't, you're too young anyway. If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive
today, their infamous sketch, "Who's on first?" might have turned out something like this:
COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store.
ABBOTT Can I help you?
COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den
and I'm thinking about buying a computer.
ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.
ABBOTT: Your computer?
COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one
ABBOTT: Mac?
COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.
ABBOTT: What about Windows?
COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?
ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?
COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?
ABBOTT: Wallpaper.
COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.
ABBOTT: Software for Windows?
COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have?
ABBOTT: Office.
COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office; can you recommend anything?
ABBOTT: I just did.
COSTELLO: You just did what?
ABBOTT: Recommend something.
COSTELLO: You recommended something?
ABBOTT: Yes.
COSTELLO: For my office?
ABBOTT: Yes.
COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?
ABBOTT: Office
COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!
ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.
COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I
want to type a proposal. What do I need?
ABBOTT: Word.
COSTELLO: What word?
ABBOTT: Word in Office.
COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.
ABBOTT:The Word in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?
ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue "W".
COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue "w" if you don't start with some straight answers. OK, forget that. Can I watch movies on the Internet?
ABBOTT: Yes, you want Real One.
COSTELLO: Maybe a real one, maybe a cartoon. What I watch is none of your business. Just tell me what I need! ABBOTT: Real One.
COSTELLO: If it's a long movie, I also want to watch reels 2, 3 and 4. Can I watch them?
ABBOTT: Of course.
COSTELLO: Great! With what?
ABBOTT: Real One.
COSTELLO:OK, I'm at my computer and I want to watch a movie. What do I do?
ABBOTT: You click the blue "1".
COSTELLO: I click the blue one what?
ABBOTT: The blue "1".
COSTELLO: Is that different from the blue w?
ABBOTT: The blue "1" is Real One and the blue "W" is Word.
COSTELLO: What word?
ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO: But there are three words in "office for
windows"!
ABBOTT: No, just one But it's the most popular Word in the world.
COSTELLO: It is?
ABBOTT: Yes, but to be fair, there aren't many other Words left. It pretty much wiped out all the other Words out there.
COSTELLO: And that word is real one?
ABBOTT: Real One has nothing to do with Word. Real
One isn't even part of Office.
COSTELLO: STOP! Don't start that again. What
about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?
ABBOTT: Money.
COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?
ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.
COSTELLO: What's bundled with my computer?
ABBOTT: Money
COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?
ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.
COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?
ABBOTT: One copy.
COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?
ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.
COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money? ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!
(A few days later).
ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?
ABBOTT: Click on "START".......
[ Edited on 20-2-2006 by Bizarre ]
Futue te ipsum!!!
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 77bay
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| posted on February 20th, 2006 at 05:21 PM |
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Ha ha, very clever. I know how they feel sometimes.:thumb
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pod
A.k.a.: paul mrvw061
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i`ve got to finish this thing one day
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| posted on February 20th, 2006 at 06:32 PM |
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very good 
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empi
A.k.a.: Empstar
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| posted on February 20th, 2006 at 06:35 PM |
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Brilliant man .
"If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you." - Anonymous  |
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beerdoc
A.k.a.: Doc
Insano Dub Head
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| posted on February 20th, 2006 at 06:36 PM |
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Very clever
You have way too much spare time Barry
Cheers Doc
reVOLKS at Fyansford Geelong
20th OCT 2007 STAY TUNED FOR DETAILS
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XXX-1.8T
Bishop of Volkswagenism
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| posted on February 20th, 2006 at 07:35 PM |
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man i love those the old comedies, they dont make comedians like they used to.
I remeber watching this old Jerry Lewis movie about 4 months ago forgot what the name was.
Girl rocks up in a mint 60's beetle she says to Jerry Lewis (bellboy) " i want you to get everything out of the trunk and bring it up to my
room"
Jerry opens up the back of the beetle and see's the engine and freaks!
next thing it shows Jerry panting and leaves the engine in her room!!!!
U cant get comedy like that these days!
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baybuscamperkid
Compulsive Aussie Vee Dubber
prince of insufficient light, ruler of heck
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| posted on February 20th, 2006 at 08:42 PM |
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very clever, did u come up with it? if so very cool
Reimagined/Recycled/Upcycled Cool
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Bizarre
Super Moderator
The artist formerly known as blue74l
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| posted on February 20th, 2006 at 08:57 PM |
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| Quote: | Originally
posted by baybuscamperkid
very clever, did u come up with it? if so very cool
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I wish!!
Nah - just one of those emails that does the rounds
You will all probabally receive it in the next couple of days
Guess i am getting old - but that Who's on first sketch is one of their funniest.
You cant just hear Abbot whinging...."awww... now dont start that again!!."
[ Edited on 20-2-2006 by Bizarre ]
Futue te ipsum!!!
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 barls
A.k.a.: Mr indestructible
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| posted on February 20th, 2006 at 09:00 PM |
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it doesnt beat the dead parrot sketch or the philosopher song
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Bizarre
Super Moderator
The artist formerly known as blue74l
Posts: 12780
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| posted on February 20th, 2006 at 09:05 PM |
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awww.....could debate that ...
Considering this was .... what 30yrs earlier???
Abbot and Costello would have to be one of THE first media comics???
Ummmm.......you HAVE heard the "Who's on First" sketch??
More to the point......... you HAVE heard of ABBOT & COSTELLO Barls???
Futue te ipsum!!!
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barls
A.k.a.: Mr indestructible
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| posted on February 20th, 2006 at 09:15 PM |
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of course and red skelton as well mate. i had a upbringing that included all the great comedians including Bill hicks
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Starbug
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| posted on February 21st, 2006 at 12:47 AM |
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thats classic i love the whos on first sketch... this one is just as
good
in the beginning, the universe was created.
this made alot of people very angry and is widely regarded as a bad move.
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penguin
A.k.a.: Chris
Bishop of Volkswagenism
ackkkkkk thhhhhpt!
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| posted on February 21st, 2006 at 06:54 AM |
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Lol
'Ah, whatever................'
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winerot
Custom Title Time!
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| posted on February 21st, 2006 at 07:46 AM |
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nice one bizarre brings back the good old days when on a rainy sunday you would
have movies galour on all 3 commercial channels to watch all arvo, ma & pa kettle,
bing & bob,cowboys & indians,elvis & girls hmmm theres a theme there & of cause
abbott & costello, by the way about the "click on start button":P:thumb
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bugeyedbabe
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| posted on February 21st, 2006 at 08:39 AM |
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i love it...
dubless. 
And who the helled parked the Mitsubishi "Prancer" under my
house??? |
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ColumBUS
A.k.a.: The Liquid Chef
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| posted on February 21st, 2006 at 10:00 AM |
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have to agree with bizarre, it is the greatest.
the who's on first sketch is the most translated and appreciated comedy sketch in the world. its classic and nothing will beat it. not even monty
python, black adder or red dwarf.
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