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English Cricket

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Bizarre Moderator The artist formerly known as blue74l

12,789 posts · joined Aug 2002 ·

#391408
Here we go with the sad funnies - but what the heck :bounce:bounce:bounce


Q. What does Geraint Jones and Michael Jackson have in common?
A. They both wear gloves for no apparent reason

Q. What is the height of optimism?
A. An English batsman applying sunscreen.

Q. What does Ashley Giles put in his hands to make sure the next ball almost always takes a wicket? A. A bat.

Q. What would Glen McGrath be if he was an Englishman?
A. An allrounder.

Q. What advantage do Kevin Pieterson, Andrew Strauss, Geraint Jones and Simon Jones have over the rest of their team-mates?
A. At least they can say they're not really English.

Q. What is the English version of a hat-trick?
A. Three runs in three balls.

Q. What do you call an Englishman with 100 runs against his name?
A. A bowler.

Q. What is the most proficient form of footwork displayed by English batsmen? A. The walk back to the pavilion.

Q. Who has the easiest job in the English squad?
A. The guy who removes the red ball marks from the bats.

Q. Why is Andrew Flintoff the unluckiest English player?
A. Because he was born in England.

Q. What does "Ashes" stand for?
A. Another Sad Horrific English Series.

Q. What's the English version of LBW?
A. Lost, Beaten, Walloped.

Q. Who spends the most time on the crease of anyone in the English team?
A. The person who ironed the cricket whites.
Futue te ipsum!!!

Midlife crisis Nartispuddlejumper, Bureau of Toxicity

2,282 posts · joined May 2003 ·

#391411
I like them all!!!!!!!!!!! Must show son when he gets home, he has cricket tomorrow so can pass them on.
If you can't laugh at yourself you can't laugh at anyone else! Because life is to short not to LAUGH

amazer kombi pilot

3,187 posts · joined Aug 2002 ·

#391420
english... cricket... if there was ever a conflict in terms 😀
Chris.... kombi pilot, oval dreamer... finisher #26971 2005 city to surf

hallph Commited Dubber

69 posts · joined Feb 2005 ·

#391462
Q. What is the height of optimism?
A. An English batsman applying sunscreen.

I like it! 👍 😀

~air fooled~ two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl

1,429 posts · joined Mar 2004 ·

#391556
hahah jolly odd hahaha
everything dies baby, thats a fact..
maybe everything that dies one day comes back..
put your make up on and your hair up pretty..
and meet me tonight in Atlantic city..

GASBNR Fahrvergnugen

894 posts · joined Jan 2003 ·

#397088
NOW WHO'S LAUGHING!!!
SORRY BOUT THAT!

Robo Compulsive Aussie Vee Dubber

4,491 posts · joined Feb 2003 ·

#397090
Can't believe how lucky the poms have been. 5 dropped catches and 2 outs on no balls. What the bloody hells going on. Oh and David Gillespie bowling practice balls!
Rob...
Boxer Power
Member of DMLRK.....Die Mittler Lebuns Resto Komeradschaft

GASBNR Fahrvergnugen

894 posts · joined Jan 2003 ·

#397094
I don't think we will win, (the ashes)
But you have to say its worth staying up for.
SORRY BOUT THAT!

amazer kombi pilot

3,187 posts · joined Aug 2002 ·

#397111
*amazer throws burning paper bag of dog poo at empikg*
Chris.... kombi pilot, oval dreamer... finisher #26971 2005 city to surf

zac_smits Coolest Person Ever!

3,634 posts · joined Jan 2003 ·

#397117
i hope we win..

i ave to hope...
MOB: 0423890217