Why you never question a drunk.
I was shopping at the local supermarket where I selected:
A litre of milk
A carton of eggs
A carton of orange juice
A 250 gram. package of bacon
A head of lettuce
A 1 kilo. can of coffee
As I was unloading my items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind me watched as I placed the items in front of the cashier.
While the cashier was ringing up the purchases, the drunk calmly stated, "You must be single."
I was a bit startled by this proclamation, but I was intrigued by the derelict's intuition, since I was indeed single. I looked at the six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about my selections that could have tipped off the drunk to my marital status.
Curiosity getting the better of me, I said: "Well, you know what, you're absolutely right. But how on earth did you know that?"
The drunk replied, "Cause you're ugly."
If you can't fix it with a hammer,
you have an electrical problem....
Oh thats nice isn't it, i would i have come back with "I may be ugly but your drunk, i am sober and i can make you uglier and you won't see the fists coming". WTF is a drunk doing at the supermarket, how did he get there, what an arsehole.
This is my Volkswagen, there are many like it, but this one is mine. Without me my Volkswagen is useless, without my Volkswagen, I am useless.
61 Karmann Ghia 2110cc type1 w Los Panchito's
66 Deluxe Beetle 2270 type 4
10 Subaru WRX Impreza
Adam at least you had the OJ and lettuce in there...I'd question the single guy classification he gave you... I would have thought maybe just too busy to cook dinner, has a hot brekkie and eats out a lot 😂
OK there was no washing powder or cleaning products whether household or personal...yes he was an astute drunk
...hmmmmm what sort of lettuce did you buy...iceberg or a gourmet lettuce??
I was coming home on the train the other night and there was a drunk or psycho person talking rubbish the hole way home....luckily I was well away from him but oly heard him talking to others around him I think...it was all about women...the type you get in MX (our free read on the train at night tabloid down here in MELB)...how he can't get a woman and how much it costs him to go to StKilda..the going rate:jesus
I think everyone had their heads buried deep in the MX and were avoiding eye contact...I too a quick glance over my shoulder to get a looks at him and hoped he didn't catch me😀
Adam your not ugly!:kiss
Good laugh for me probably not for u.
Couldn't have written a better joke, thats cool.
Keep the steering and the propulsion seperate . Still a Kombi...
It's all good, until it's bad, i suppose
Just another joke email I got that I thought I'd share. I actually have a beautiful fiance who loves me very much for my good looks (I also own all of my debts outright). I'm such a catch.🤓
If anyone want's to be on my "spam" joke list feel free to u2u your email addy and I'll clog your inbox with golden moments such as this. Afterall, only about 10% of emails sent are important anyway!
Disclaimer.
Actual "gold" will not be sent to the recipient via email. Spam or other tinned ham products will not be sent via email or any other means due to the cost of postage and shortage of pigs small enough to fit in a tin. For everything else, there is mastercard. Mine is maxxed out, can I have yours?
- Adam
If you can't fix it with a hammer,
you have an electrical problem....
