There is a thread already saying "a silly question" with one reply saying there's no such thing.
So it's time to find out if there is.
I'll start this off with two.
The first is one EVERYONE will know, because EVERY mother has asked it, & that is;
Where did you lose it??
The second is just an annoyance & it may just be me. I've been dealing with one doctor for over 20 years & I've got to be in absolute misery to make an appointment.
The first thing his receptionist will say when I walk in the door;
How are you?:puke
Then, of course, there's half questions. Very common in my line of work.
Someone will race up to my window & say, for arguements sake, does this train go to Blacktown. Yes. Then at Blacktown they'll say, you didn't stop at Toongabie.🤪 What was it you asked me?
There's not one person on the job that wont have happenned to.
Well my friends are gone & my hair is grey, I ache in the places where I used to play.
When my sister was learning to drive a car (my Dad teaching and for some dumb reason I was there too) my Dad told her to turn left. Her question: "Which way do I turn the wheel?!"
That was 8 years ago, and I can still count on one hand the number of times I've been a passenger when she's driving.
Burling down the road with wife No 2 at about 80 MPH in a TR6 ragtop , knew there was a turn coming up quickly but didn't know if it was a left or right hander, so, as she was navigating, I howled out "is the next turn left or right ?" Answer--screamed back---" NO YOU DONT GO STRAIGHT ON "
Now on wife No 3
:beer
Al.
My new pet hate... anyone who asks the question, usually with a cynical overtone... "Why do you drive a kombi?" 😬
"Mr Writer, why don't you tell it like it is? Why don't you tell it like it REALLY is?" - stereophonics
fekkinell wrote:My new pet hate... anyone who asks the question, usually with a cynical overtone... "Why do you drive a kombi?" 😬
Because you can! :P
Tis like when ur screamin in pain or completely shitted off with the most foulest look on ur face...... everyone always asks this...
"Are you ok?"
....
Does it look like I'm ok? 😂
(ô_!_/ô) (ô_!_/ô)
69' baja: kombi box, thing spindles, irs, disc front, type 3 rear drums, 2 inch lift kit, 31x10 rears. 👍
New engine in process: 94mm p&bs, 74mm C/w chomol Crank, 35.5x39 SP heads, turbo. Wierd combo, hopeful torque monsta!
Pretty_Blue_Bug wrote:fekkinell wrote:My new pet hate... anyone who asks the question, usually with a cynical overtone... "Why do you drive a kombi?" 😬
Because you can! :P
You've restored my faith in people!
😀"Mr Writer, why don't you tell it like it is? Why don't you tell it like it REALLY is?" - stereophonics
my chick often asks stupid questions, like "what day is the saturday night movie on?" and when i was trying to fit a magnetic tool holder to my box she says "are you sure its a magnetic tool holder?" i turned it round and showed her in big red and yellow letters across the front it says MAGNETIC TOOL HOLDER.
if nothing else she makes me laff!!😀😀😀
and she helps me with my vee dubs!
3 1959 cadillacs
1 musso
2 early notchbacks
2 split kombis
2 split panels
1 split ute
1 low light panel
1 ex-pmg bay
1 country buggy
1 beetle ute
1 14" syncro caravelle
1 16" syncro doka
1 golf cabrio
1 vw camper trailer
2 3meter bombs
I would say most of the stupid questions I get asked are at work, & 90% of them BY my employer, in the way of written reports.
A "stock kill report", is something you fill out after hitting a cow.
One question is "What was the first sighting of the beast?". The very next question is "What was the second sighting of the beast?".
Apparently your meant to shut your eyes & hope it goes away.
I've seen some great answers to that over the years.
One was cow coming out of grass & second sighting was grass coming out of cow.
Another beauty relates to bajachris's "are you ok?", & that is the "Witness to injury" report.
One of the questions on this is;
"What were the victims first words?"
A lot of blokes enjoyed filling that one out.
As most would know, my language in the course of general conversation is somewhat colourful.
The night a spindle handbrake let go on me & broke three of my fingers, the first words of the victim will NEVER, EVER be fit for this forum. But my mate wrote it down for the clerks.
Well my friends are gone & my hair is grey, I ache in the places where I used to play.
I lost it in a tent. On a scout camp away with the girl guides.
my father in law is the king of dumb questions.
I've got a shocking flu at the moment, cant talk, constantly blowing my nose and coughing my guts up. He knew I had today off because I was sick. He then walks in the kitchen and asks who has been using the Dimetapp.
Yesterday for the umteenth time he asked me what happened to my mums hearing, why does she wear a hearing aid. I keep saying she was born that way but he wont accept it. Something has to HAPPEN to your ears for you to go deaf.
Once he walked in the lounge looked at the TV which had 2 people sitting behind a desk talking and asked if the news was on yet. I said no and he walked away :duh
He struggled to work my tv system with 4 remotes so I bought a harmony programmable remote which wasnt cheap. Now only one remote is needed. Press 'watch TV' and it all comes on, already set up. All you have to worry about is volume and channel selection. Which is clearly labeled 'Vol' and 'Ch'. After 5 months yesterday he asks me if the arrows were for volume. I said no, use volume on the left. Didnt stop him from having 3 more goes at it though.
Many many times I've wanted to say something smartarse. Living with inlaws while building a house is pretty hard going for someone like me who tends to be blunt. I think I may use this thread for venting.
Oh he's 'restoring' an antique chest of drawers. The base of the drawers are worn out from 100 years of rubbing on the runners. He's been spending weekends with a router cutting grooves in the bases and gluing in strips of pine in its place, then planing it all down. I said to him, wouldnt it be easier to just replace the whole drawer bottom? It would be, but he wants to keep it original. WTF?
The dumbest question I ever heard came from a night when two trains hit each other.
To make a long story short; the out of gauge train was wider than all other trains, usually a load of steel plates. Because of this nothing could come opposite. So this thing had a set corridor, never ran late, never ran early, & the only time a train could come the other way was if the out of gauge was in a siding.
A bloke in operations forgot this one night & sent out a local shunter. They hit between Kotara & Cardiff, opened up the shunting engine like a tin can. By sheer luck no one was killed.
A week later I was doing my final exams as a driver & the most senior inspector in the state came in holding up a piece of paper.
His words to us;
"I want you men to remember this for the rest of your career. THIS is how much THEY know about what WE do." (they being the clerks)
The paper was the please explain sent to the driver of the shunting engine. The question, that still amuses drivers to this day & still epitomises the gap between drivers & clerks was:
"What evasive action did you take?"
Well my friends are gone & my hair is grey, I ache in the places where I used to play.
Hi
I work for a large motoring organisation doing road service. I could fill the page with silly things that people say, but one always comes up and sticks in mind.
I have my head under a cars bnonnet, Im doing a load check on the battey, I ask the member to start car, nothing happens because the battery is stuffed and then they say" no nothing there" or words to that effect. I was already aware of this because the car didnt make a sound.
Steve
I was working on a Island on the Whitsundays when I met an American Couple Mid 40's strolling along the beach
(Americans just love to talk without thinking, something I have observed before) after 4 or 5 mins of conversation telling them what we were filming, the woman looks at and say's "Is there water all around this Island"
Keeping it real !
classic question asked when every second woman falls pregnant unexpectedly and usually by the father of the baby or by a prospective grandparent..."how on earth did that happen?"
:alien
Is that your best price?
or
Can you give me your best price?
or
What is your best price?
[ Edited on 30-5-2007 by kombikim ]
Please, I need drivers side window regulator (winder mechanism) for my '54
someone stands next to you for a few minutes watching what you are doing, (eg cooking dinner) then they ask...
"what are you doing?"
the other is the old australian greeting...
"how ya goin?"
they are not interested in the answer, why do they ask? why not say "g'day" or "hello" instead.
bartenders get some pretty stunning questions...
Usually by the younguns, I have actually heard this one more than once.
"What's in a gin and tonic?"
I work at a particularly large bar, with 64 beers on tap that run around the entire back wall of the bar... and still i get asked the questions...
"Do you have any beers on tap?"
"What sort of tap beers do you have?"
i throw ice at them after pointing to the taps.
i think the worst one is "Really?" or "Did you?" after you explain a long story
for example..
"Today I had a chicken and salad roll form the corner shop and on the way home i got pulled over by the cops....................................(long stoy)"
and then someone says "Did you?"
WHY WOULD I TELL YOU THIS IF IT WASNT REAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
once an old chap was "fishing" over a railway bridge, just to humor the chap a young lad asks "so how many have you caught?"
the old fella turned and in a dry voice replied "you're the third!"
🤪🤪🤪
3 1959 cadillacs
1 musso
2 early notchbacks
2 split kombis
2 split panels
1 split ute
1 low light panel
1 ex-pmg bay
1 country buggy
1 beetle ute
1 14" syncro caravelle
1 16" syncro doka
1 golf cabrio
1 vw camper trailer
2 3meter bombs
I was in Toronto Canada a few years ago at one of their "beaches" (which is a lake) and was chatting to a Canadian couple. The fairly attractive blond wife asked where I was visiting from (Austalia), then asked "Did you fly or drive ?".........
My mum stopped in a sydney motel corridoor by an american who asked "can you drink the water out of the faucet".
She just said yes, but its kinda insulting knowing that they werent sure if we are third world or not.
An american beauty pageant some years ago.. the compere asks the entrant
"What do you like about Christmas?"
.. and the reply.. (said with an american southern drawl..)...
" Oh I think Christmas is really neat.. I think we should have it, at least, every year......."
my friends daughter often calls my house phone and asks ...."where are you?'......(She's 15...)
Ring someone up, coughing and sneezing, barely able to talk.."are you sick?"....
And Pete...once it was my doctors asking "how did you get pregnant??" My reply "How did you get your degree...and can I see the certificate...because the HOW is very basic" The nurse assisting burst out laughing as he walked away for a few minutes...
Or when a dr looks at a chart and says...yes...i can see now...still looking at chart...it should be painful about here....
Ummm...yep...the big lump would indicate that too
dubless. 🥲
🥷 And who the helled parked the Mitsubishi "Prancer" under my house??? 🥷
😂
the one i like is with the kids ,ive got one under 5 and ya say what did you do that for and the reply ,,,,dont know or cause i can
BETTER TO BE THOUGHT A FOOL THAN TO OPEN YOUR MOUTH AND REMOVE ALL DOUBT:puke
haha my girlsfriends father was asking for low fat salt!! do what??
my chick was chatting about cars n stuff, " my favorite ferrari is a PORSCHE!"
HOW CAN YOU NOT FALL ABOUT LAFFIN?
3 1959 cadillacs
1 musso
2 early notchbacks
2 split kombis
2 split panels
1 split ute
1 low light panel
1 ex-pmg bay
1 country buggy
1 beetle ute
1 14" syncro caravelle
1 16" syncro doka
1 golf cabrio
1 vw camper trailer
2 3meter bombs
